Monday, August 29, 2011

Playing Favorites

The other morning, Sam informed me that "I am having a WONDERFUL day!"
I was thrilled.  You go, little one.  Enjoy your wonderful day.
Later in the day, I asked if it was still wonderful.
She scowled and said "No."
"What happened?"
"It isn't wonderful any more because you were so mean to me."
Ouch.  Of course, I had no idea what she was talking about, I thought the day had gone pretty smoothly.  So I said "When was I mean to you today? What are you talking about?"
She glowered and said "When I smacked my brother's face, you punished me."

Oh, brother.  That's right.  When my three year old takes on my 6-month-old physically, I always take his side, even at the expense of ruining Sam's day.
I am such a jerk about that.

The sad part is, I'm so constantly reminding Sam to be careful around her brother, making sure she doesn't accidentally (or purposely) injure him, or otherwise mess with him, that I didn't even remember this specific incident even on the same day.  I wish it was rare enough to ruin my whole day, but Sam is just too curious for Peyton's good.  "Okay, mommy, I not poke his eyes to see if they're squishy again."  Yep.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Carly Vs. Talking Tom

If I ever find the inventor of the Talking Tom Cat app, I will unapologetically slap him (or her) in the face.
Then if I get sued, I will just have my defense be my lawyer saying everything into the Tom Cat app to be repeated by that high pitched voice.  Then I will not only get off, but probably have a day named in my honor.
This might be needless to say, but Sam has recently rediscovered the joy of Tom Cat.  In fact, she found a screaming flying monkey slingshot toy my father gave her (and yes, you read that right), and was trying to get the cat to copy the scream.  It did.  Every time. And I thought nothing could be more annoying than the actual monkey itself.  I was wrong.  I would further like to note, that my father also introduced Sam to Tom Cat.  I am currently not speaking to him.
Another quirk was Sam putting my ipod on the stairs and seeing how far away she could go, and how loud she could yell to get the cat to copy her.  Turns out, she can go pretty far, and yell pretty loud.  It gets hard to make out, but the cat's voice is just as annoying. 
Finally, I brought Peyton upstairs to find Sam and Daniel playing with Tom Cat just now.  Sam used her baby voice and said "Hey Peyton, sweet boy!  Do you want to hear the cat fart?  Do you?  Do you want to hear it fart?"
I said "Sam!"
She said, "Oh sorry.  Toot."
I could just take my ipod away, I know.  But that would make too much sense, and probably turn Tom into forbidden fruit she can't get enough of.  Instead, I will continue to let her use her ipod time to drive me crazy until she loses interest and is recaptured by Angry Birds, Fruit Ninja, or Monkey Preschool Lunchbox.  Now there's a monkey I can get behind.  No screaming at all, just a cute little giggle.  Plus, he's educational.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Ten Things

Here are Ten Funny Things Sam said just today:

10. When she found her brother on the floor preparing to roll somewhere she said "Hey Buddy.  Where you headed?"
9.  "Mom, I don't want to stand up in the tub today and get my bum cleaned, ok?"
8.  "Help, my leg won't go under the table." Then she straightened out her leg.  "Never mind, there it goes."
7.  To her own leg: "Watch out leg, or you'll get your butt kick!  Haha! I just called my leg a bum crack!  That's funny."
6. In the car, after a rare minute or two of silence, "Oh man, I am cracking myself up!"
5. Me: "How was preschool?" Sam: "It was okay.  A few kids made bad choices. But mostly, it was good."
4. Me: "Who made bad choices?  What happened?" Sam: "Well, this one kid kept walling.  And I just really hate that."  I tried, but was unable to figure out what "walling" is.  She did name the perpetrator, but never actually told me what it was he was doing.
3. "Some volcanoes are hot, and some volcanos are just fun.  I only like the hot ones."
2. I was on the phone to Daniel whispering that because we have had such stressful and lousy days yesterday and today, I wanted to do something fun today with Sam.  When I described what it was as quietly as possible from the backseat, Sam yelled "Hey, did you just tell Daddy you were taking me to McDonalds!? Is that what I just heard you say?   You were too quiet!"
1. I noticed that Sam was walking out of our room with every one of the toys Peyton had been playing with on the floor.  I told her she needed to give them back so he would have something to play with while I bathed her.  She said "Mom, he's okay.  I traded him.  Look at him playing!  Hey Peyton, isn't that so much fun!? Aren't you having fun with your toy!?"  She had taken all of his toys and "traded" him one of those half-sphere stacking toys.  Just one. And it was out of his reach already. Then she added "Okay, since he's having fun over there, I'm just going to put these toys where he can't get them while I take a bath."  Me: "Sam, those are his toys, he can play with them." Sam: "It's okay, he doesn't need them! He's having fun!"

Yes, this is what a day at our house is like.  I'd also like to point out that it is only noon, she woke up late, and spent two hours at preschool.  Daniel wanted to know why I don't keep a record of all the funny things Sam says.  Volume, honey.  Sheer volume.

Monday, August 15, 2011

Pennies on the Tracks

As a kid, I remember hearing that a single penny on the tracks could derail a train.  I don't think it's actually true and was probably just passed along to keep kids from doing dumb things like getting too close to trains to try to flatten pennies.  Another reason I don't know is because I am super neurotic and a worrywart and would never go anywhere near a moving train as a child or an adult to test the theory anyway.  Plus, I have really bad luck and even if in the history of ever a single penny has not once derailed a train, I would be the first person ever to do it, and then I would get sued and feel horrible the rest of my life.  Who needs that noise?  So, the point of this tangent is based on the (probably inaccurate) theory that a single penny can derail a train.
If there is one thing I have learned in parenthood, it's that a penny can derail the train.  Today was a penny day. 

It was all around a rough day. My family left this morning to go back to Utah.  I'm very close to my family and I get really sad when they leave, especially if I have no date in mind for our next visit.  Sam and I both cried all morning.  Emotions were running high and to top it off Sam didn't fall asleep until midnight last night, woke up at 6:15 to say goodbye to my parents, and unbelievably managed to have 3 hours of "quiet time" without caving into to a nap for one minute.  She was beyond exhausted, which can only mean one thing...

Massive tantrums about everything!!!!  Everything was a gigantic problem all evening long.  At one point, she threw a tantrum about the fact that she couldn't stop crying.  I kid you not.  It was rough.  Daniel got home from work, and without me asking or saying one word, he offered to make dinner.  I don't want to know how bad I must have looked to merit that.  So, it was a hard day, with a lot of hard things, but we had powered through.  Peyton was an absolute angel who napped extra to make up for his crazy sister, and we were cheering up at dinner, ready to be happy again.

We decided to go to a nearby store and look at their new Halloween stuff.  Sam loves Halloween stuff. I loved the thought of leaving the house (with adult help) after the day we'd had.  We got all ready to go, and were headed out the door, when Sam pranced out of the guest room and slammed the door behind her.  Daniel asked where Peyton's car seat was so he could buckle him in, and I said I had put it in the guest room, just to get it out of the hallway for the day.  It was then that he discovered Sam had locked the door before she shut it.  Apparently, she locked it to keep sharks safely inside and out of the rest of the house.
The guest room takes an actual key.  Not one of those little sticks, but an actual key like you would use for the front door.  Daniel grabbed the keys we got when we moved in, one was for the house itself, and the other wasn't.  We assumed it was for the indoor doors that use a key instead of a stick (there's three).  The key didn't work. The front door key didn't work. We found another key inside the garage when we moved in.  Maybe it was that one.  It wasn't.
The property management company didn't give us a key to the bedroom doors to our house!!!  It wouldn't have mattered much, because there's nothing in there we need, except for that car seat!  We can't take Peyton anywhere without it. Luckily, he wasn't already in it when she locked it, or we would have been in real trouble.  Sam has preschool in the morning, so it's not like I can sit around not going anywhere waiting for them to get us a key.  We don't know any of our neighbors, or anyone in the new ward that would have a rear-facing seat they aren't using.  When we called the management company to get the emergency number for repairs (which they said would be on the recording), it wasn't on the recording.  I wanted to use the emergency line because I think they should haul a locksmith out here and get the stupid thing fixed themselves, since they didn't actually ever give us the key!  Who would have thought we could lock ourselves out of an individual room.
I finally had the idea to call a friend from the old neighborhood and try to borrow an infant carseat so I could get Sam to preschool and possibly to the management company to pick up a key (if they have one).  We had to get a hold of someone right away, because we had to pick it up before Daniel had to leave for work at 6am, since one of us had to stay home with Peyton to go anywhere not in walking distance.  Sam went with Daniel to pick it up, because if I had to deal with one more hiccup, I thought my brain would explode. We got a seat, but we are still locked out of the room.

Hard to believe that a single flick of a lock could totally derail our evening like that.  Oh, life, you pesky little devil!

Saturday, August 6, 2011

The Post About Nothing

It's really nothing, but it's so maddening when you go to pump your lotion after you've used it like 100 times, but for some reason there's a dried up clump hiding in the pump or something so instead of landing in a little dollop in your hand, you have to find the spot in your bathroom that got randomly hosed down by renegade lotion.  It's never in an obvious place, and it can find fabric to get stuck to like a heat seeking missile. Augh!

It's really nothing, but it's so telling when you overhear your kid playing with her toys and you realize one of them is being you.  My daughter's doll has recently threatened that another princess was "Three seconds away from losing all your privileges!"  I can tell you right now, it's painfully obvious when one of them is me, and one of them is her preschool teacher Miss Carly--Miss Carly says things like "Let's please make thumbs-up choices today, honey!" and regular Mom-Carly says things like "If you don't finish that chore right now, I'm going to take away your special cupcake.  Look at my face, do I look like I am kidding?"  Sigh.

It's really nothing, but it's so exciting when you find a coupon/sale combination that you didn't just read on a couponing website.  I get so happy at the thought that I found it myself, managed to do the mental math and figure that it was a better deal, found the coupon in my box of craziness, and did it all while wrestling my kids in a busy store without losing my temper.  It makes me feel like She-Ra, and a little bit like a renegade agent for breaking off the game plan. 

It's really nothing, but it's such a relief when you find an extra diaper at the bottom of the bag when you thought you were out and you are nowhere near home when everything goes horribly south in the changing station of a public restroom.  It makes me feel like my subconscious snuck in and left me a little gift without telling my conscious mind about it..."you're going to need this later, but you'll promptly forget this ever happened."

It's really nothing, but it's so adorable when one kid takes it upon themselves to help the other.  Sam has just recently started trying to cheer Peyton up with jokes, hand him toys, find his binky--all by herself.  She even has this horrifyingly scary voice she thinks is cute baby-talk that makes him laugh.  (It gives me nightmares).  Still I swell with pride when I hear her yell "Peyton needs a superhero, here I come, Buddy!  I will help you!"

It's really nothing, but it's so disconcerting when someone else loads your dishwasher differently than you do.  It just is.  Not that I don't more than appreciate the help in the kitchen!

It's really nothing, but it's so wonderful when someone you don't see often enough says they've been thinking of you.  When we met up with Daniel's family after our vacation, my 6-year-old niece said "Oh, Carly, I really missed you while you were gone!"  Oh my goodness, I can't tell you how much that warmed my heart.  Just what I needed!

It's really nothing, but it's so satisfying when you finish reading a book.  Hey, world, I just managed to squeak in something for myself!  And, unlike my countless craft projects and writings, I actually finished it without getting too busy or distracted and wandering away, never to return! Booyah! Since I spent time at my parents house in July, I managed to read four.  Four whole books in a month--I might as well have landed on the moon, I was so psyched.  (Sidenote:  The Help was totally awesome and I am jazzed for the movie, Bossypants was hilarious if you don't mind a few swears, The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks was very interesting, but a bit of a downer, and Outliers was good, but I felt had some gaping holes.  I just wrote four book reviews for you, I am ON FIRE!)

It's really nothing, but it's so miraculous when you peek at your children while they're asleep.  Best thing in the world, hands down.  It's really nothing, but it's everything.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

To Daycare, or not to daycare...

Today we had to go to the bank, which happens to be next to a local daycare.  As this daycare has an outside playground, Sam asks every time we drive by, if she can please go to that park.  I then explain that it isn't a park, it's a private playground, and its only for the kids who go to that daycare.  Sam finally understands what daycare is (after many of these conversations), so today she told me, "that's the playground for the kids whose mommies or daddies go to work and they go to daycare, right?  But I stay with you during the day?"
I said "Yeah, that's right, mommy stays home to take care of you, so that's why you don't go to a daycare like that, but some kids do."
Then from the back, I hear Sam talking...
"Hmmm, I like that they have their own playground at daycare.  But...I also like spending time with my mommy.  BUT...Woody and Buzz go to daycare in Toy Story 3, and I really like Woody and Buzz!  But...I couldn't go to preschool at Miss Carly's if I was at daycare..."
She was debating with herself the pros and cons of daycare!  I tried to weigh in and say I loved spending time with her, and would be sad to leave her all day, but Sam cut me off and yelled "Mom!  Don't listen to me!  I'm just talking to ME!"
Whoops.  She was just discussing it with herself.  My bad.
Since I wasn't allowed to voice my opinion, I wonder when it would be appropriate to tell her that she doesn't actually get to pick whether she goes to daycare or not?  I guess if the debate comes out not in favor of staying with mom, I'll drop that bomb on her.